THE POTENTIAL OF A HUMAN TOUCH

How many of you want to just go and hug your friends tightly?

How many of you want to go to the local trains and get that free massage at peak hours of traveling?

How many of you are tired of touching the mouse and talking on the screen?

How many of you have not washed your hands when it was touched by your crush? (I have…just saying)

How many of the recruiters are waiting to judge the candidate based on the grip of their handshake?

Can you guess what I am talking about? (Of course you can… you read the title). So yes, today’s blog is about the human touch, rather the power of human touch. I am sure most of us are waiting to get out of our houses freely and get back to the normal lives and don’t want to succumb to the ‘new normal’. With COVID taking over the world and forcing the lockdowns, it has led to an inability of humans to touch each other, their pets or even the non-living commodities without the fear and apprehension of catching the virus.

What is even scarier is that this dreadful practice of no touch is going to live with us for a long period of time (unless a successful vaccine with proper clinical trials is available) and might also conditioned us to live without the touch. But, I would not want that to happen. So here am I trying to point out the potential of a human touch so that with precautions we can try to bring back the touch. Let’s begin from beginning.

MOTHER’S TOUCH:

The first minute after the birth of the child is very crucial in every aspect. The first thing that the baby does is cry which helps in clearing of the respiratory passage and in turn aids in breathing. If the delivery is normal then the next action involves providing a skin-to-skin touch between the infant and the mother. This initial contact is of utmost importance as the warmth generated helps the baby know that it’s safe and secured. It also leads to physical bonding between the mother and the child.

However, if it’s a pre-mature baby or if it’s a C-section, it is possible that the infant might not be able to breathe properly and therefore is kept in a warming station which prevents this initial contact. This does not mean that one has lost this most important opportunity to form a bonding, because ultimately the health of the baby is more important. (And yes…it’s not as easy as saying ‘alll izz well’ and the baby starts crying).

Another aspect of the mother’s touch is breast-feeding. Researches have provided evidence that breast-feeding plays a very significant role in nurturing the child’s need of security and well-being in addition to its nutritional benefits. One of the studies also found that breast-feeding dyads showed higher quality of relationships. However, bottle-feeding dyads did not show poor quality of relationships, implicating that if the child is deprived of it, it will not necessarily led to eternal damage.

What are the benefits of breast-feeding?

• It allows for more skin-to-skin touch which improves affect and reduces anxiety.
• When mothers touch their infants more often while breast-feeding it leads to increase maternal responsivity and bondings are observed.
• It might also lead to secure attachment style for the child.

However, a flip part of these results is that these effects are short-lived. Secondly, there are a lot more factors like the environment of upbringing, the role of the father, the societal context, etc. which also play a role in the development of the child. At the same time, the benefits cannot be ignored.

COMFORTING TOUCH:

How many of you are longing for that hug from that one person who just makes you feel safe in their arms? (Too much Bollywood?). You know why you do that because that hug or the skin contact is so comforting that you forget all your stresses. I am not saying this, there have been researches which have proved that a touch increases the level of the hormone oxytocin (also called happy hormone) which in turn reduces the stress hormones.

A comforting touch could be from someone you love or someone who is close to you, be it your friend, partner, parents or your grandparents and is prescribed at all the stages of life.

• A child when born is exposed to this safe touch (we already talked about that).
• As adolescents we derive this share of touch from our friends in the form of hugging or different ways of handshaking.

• As we move on to becoming adults, we seek this need of touch from our partners (which could be emotional as well as sexual).
• The elderly need the most amount of touch but unfortunately they are the most deprived of it (which might be because of number of reasons like losing their spouse, living alone or any kind of health conditions)

A comforting touch is most needed in times of grief. Having lost someone could be a very difficult process and would take time. But what they miss the most could be the physical and the emotional touch of the deceased. The healing power of touch here could be of utmost use as it helps in decreasing the pain, isolation and the anxiety and ultimately helps in decreasing the sensory deprivation.

More than anything else, a touch is also a form of communication. Similar to the saying ‘eyes speak a lot’ a touch can also be beneficial when you are at lack of words. A simple touch on the fist of a person can say a lot of things like-‘I love you’ ‘I am here for you’ ‘you will be alright’.

PROFESSIONAL TOUCH:

One needs to be very careful with touch in professional spaces as there are chances of it being misinterpreted. But that does not mean that the touch loses its importance. A handshake on finalizing a deal or a pat on the back or high-five could work as a motivating factor for the employees.

Furthermore, same-sex touch or opposite sex touch also impacts this area. For example, it would be fine for two female colleagues to hug each other on completion of a project, however this behaviour could be translated into something else if the hug was between a male and a female colleague. Just to be clear, I am not in any way saying that there is something wrong with this, but there are some organizational guidelines which one needs to follow.

Secondly, in some professions there is also a question of ethics. I will talk about my profession (rather to be profession), in a counselling setting, it is forbidden to have any kind of relations with the client outside of the therapy session- no friendships, no business relations, and no sexual relations (like Duh!). These kinds of ethical considerations will prevent one to use ‘touch’ in professional settings. However, with experience one may learn the discretion to use it according to the situation.

SEXUAL TOUCH:

Yes, I am going to make you uncomfortable by talking about sexual touch. (but, to be honest it is nothing to be uncomfortable about). To know about this kind of touch is very important, you’ll know why as you read further.

The sexual touch that most of the people are familiar with is the one shared among romantic partners/spouse/lovers. This kind of a tactile stimulation can do wonders in helping the couple bond with each other, communicate effectively and also increase the pleasure during sexual intercourse. In addition, conflict resolution is also easier for partners who show more amount of hugging, cuddling, and kissing. Studies have also shown that non-sexual physical touch also helps in lowering the blood pressure levels.

Another side of sexual touch is in the form of abuse. Sexual abuse, especially child sexual abuse is increasing day by day. To know the difference between sexual touch and sexual abuse, one needs to experience what a safe touch feels like. Any discomforting feeling on being touched could be a red flag. But to recognize that feeling, training must be given to an individual right from the childhood. Schools must organize workshops to let children know the difference between good-touch and bad-touch. And I cannot stress upon this much that- SEX EDUCATION is a must.

Sexual harassment in work places is also on a rise. And it’s no more about just women being harassed (although their proportion is high), but men are also victims of it. More than anyone, the LGBTQ+ community is the most vulnerable to this kind of harassments. I know, I am going slightly off topic, but it is also my responsibility to let my readers be aware of these kinds of touch which causes more harm than benefits.

To know more about abuse and it’s other forms visit: https://www.mindshealer.com/uncategorized/human-trafficking/

A DOG’S TOUCH:

I know the title only suggests the potential of a human touch, but I cannot stop myself from sharing this interesting piece of information that I came across while researching for this. Because it was about dogs!!! Who doesn’t like dogs and who spends half of their day looking for dog videos on Instagram (Inner me is shouting- Me! Me! Me!).

Pets have always been a part of human life since civilizations (do you remember that photo from your history textbooks showing the buried remains of a man with their dog? That’s how important they have been to man). Thus, dogs have eternally been called man’s best friend.

So there was this research conducted in the universities of Canada after a series of suicides and incidences of self-harm. The participants were asked to come and interact with dogs. Upon arrival they were asked to check how they were feeling, play with the dog for as long as they wanted and again check on how they were feeling.

The results showed that 73 out of the 74 participants reported a shift into positive emotions. When asked why, touching emerged as one of the 5 themes (energy of the dog, distraction from the current stress, unconditional love and acceptance, reminder of the home or pet among the other 4 themes).

Some of the sayings observed were:

• “The feel of the dog’s fur and their cuteness makes me think nothing can go wrong”
• “Connection with another creature helps”
• “Being able to pet the dogs helped me”
• “Playing with the puppies took my mind off work and exams and helped me to relax and keep calm”
• “Being able to play and cuddle with the dogs helped me.”

To conclude, touch comes in gradation. In addition, setting up boundaries will also help in practicing safe touch and safe touch doesn’t mean no touch. There have also been researches coming up lately where this active touch sensations are being engineered to robot, the purpose of which is to provide these sensations to the one who are deprived of it, like the orphans or patients of corona for that matter.

Furthermore, it is culturally based. For instance, we often greet people with a namaste while in Japan a bow is a sign of respect which allows for no physical contact. USA and UK on the other hand use more hugs and handshakes to greet people. However, the importance of the touch and its benefits still hold true.

That’s it. Thank you for reading till the end.

If you haven’t read my previous blog click here

REFERENCES:

• https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/in-the-name-love/201405/why-lovers-touch-is-so-powerful
• A puppy’s touch: http://www.jstor.com/stable/j.ctv5vdcvd.10
• https://pathwayshealth.org/grief-support/the-power-of-touch-during-grief/
• Breast-feeding, Bonding and Mother-infant relationship: http://www.jstor.com/stable/23096091
• The Portal of Touch: http://www.jstor.com/stable/23307702